You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
so my dad walked in on us having sex
lulz really? why?
lets just say he wont be answering to 'daddy' for a loooooong time
I've grown up since last year. I don't give blow jobs as birthday presents anymore.
I wish the inside of the tampon box said "CONGRATULATIONS YOUR NOT A MOTHER!"
The bouncer at this strip club is my new best friend. He is also very persuasive. He got me to strip onstage for a t shirt. It's a nice shirt.
This football player keeps talking about his drunk dad. I think he may start crying. Does this deserve a roll tide?
He's cheating on her.
Are you sure it wasn't her?
I have my glasses on, and as long as she didn't change her face in the past two months; its her.
Well you wanna do it now or later? I've had three shots and I'm listening to journey by myself. Emotionally there is no better prime time than right now.
We hooked up. It felt slightly wrong considering he is my foreign exchange student but there's a reason America imports. Foreigners got the goods.
I screamed "I want dick!" in the middle of the intersection. So many hot guys. I wish you were here.
I think the paper my teacher just handed back to me had one of his pubes on it, I'm way too hungover for this
I took did three shots of fireball and did and handstand. When I stood up some busty slut lead me my the hand down the hall into her dorm room.
But I'm sure your having and "a monumentally better time" repeating the 12th grade
Literally just sitting around waiting for someone to come along and fuck my chakras back into alignment
Sorry I wasn't opportunistic about sucking your dick in an Uber last night
A respectable fucking: good but like I don't want to get kicked out of my hotel room
Randomize
