Mom and Dad are dead. Trust fund
On a scale from 0 to 24...wait, 3 to 24, where 6 is the lowest and 12 is the highest, how freaking high re you right now?
Last night he was fingering me with one hand to his ear, calling himself 'dj clittles'
Thats what happens when go home with guys that wear shutter shades to the bar..
so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
around noonish you got carried out for spitting water and throwing cups at old people...
i got totally wasted at 2pm and cleaned the house bc i was bored. my mom now supports my alcohol problem
His was the first dick to ever be in my mouth... Of course I'm going to the wedding.
You screamed for campus security to do something about the police officer who dumping ur 40
I took my shirt off and stood in the kitchen for an hour and a half talking to his parents about my tattoos
You were demanding water from a bottle but I didn't have one..so I just took the water bottle from the hamster cage. You're welcome.
There are apples in the microwave and a cup of twigs in the fridge. I think she's hiding in the pantry, I can hear her giggling. Leaving her to it.
Ed's in which sucks about a thousand cocks... But thats 1800 less than working with Alex so it's gonna be a good day
Seriously, dude... You knows its bad when you gag on her nipple.
Use "feeling words"
Yay
WHERE THE FUCK IS MY ARM DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA HOW DIFFICULT IS IS TO TYPE WITH ONE HAND
Randomize
