He said he's was gunna give me some pain meds. I'm not sure what they are but I just gave him a thumbs up
Imagine that my comprehension level is that of a 7 year old and explain your plan again
running the faucet water is not hiding the sound of you vomiting. fyi.
I'm gonna go out on a limb and say it had something to do with pool sex.
i'm only riding in the trunk because they put the case of beer back here..
I shouldn't be home alone with this much peanut butter and the dog. I feel like i'm being recorded to see when my desperation will peak.
We're high and this subject came up and I'd like a female opinion: if you were a dude, what would you do if a girl tried to give you a foot job?
Just saw a woman trying to order Mcdonalds at a trash can. God bless America.
oh my god. picked the worst day ever to not wear underwear...
I'm just gonna stop you right there because there is, in fact, no such thing.
I snorted xanax while wearing reindeer antlers. Prancer gone wild. Have a merry Christmas.
I mean, you got a giant dick. I've seen lawn gnomes that are smaller.
The guy who said he's gonna suck your butthole till your face caves in is at Maggie's
I'm sitting on the couch playing the sims, how's ur night going?
I'm sitting on my floor, drinking wine, and listening to bette midlers "wind beneath my wings"
Why are our lives so predictable?
Can I bother you for a second.
You always bother me but go on.
Stop inviting Kevin over. The dickless wonder started playing some strange Sci-FY music and speaking an alien language and the girls split.
Randomize
