Vegas for my brothers bachelor party. Just landed and I have a boner. I'm giggly and teary eyed I'm so excited.
Oh. They ARE dating. Kinda sad. Have such an urge to be a huge bitch and steal him but my morality is in the way. FUCK YOU MORALITY.
Just used my cancer results to get a free lap dance. Great day just got better.
Ive been using palmolive to shower with for he last week, dont tell me about not having money. Im heading to the bar r u going.
She asked if you knew her boyfriend, and you responded that you "think you gave him head once" and then hiccupped.
I'm going to make a mold of my tits to bake a cake for him for our anniversary.. I can see the pride in his eyes now.
If you invite me to a bar tonight my liver will kick you in the testicles
AND FUCKING MGMT JUST CAME ON. CAN I GO DROWN MYSELF IN LESBIANS OR SOMETHING? IS IT TIME TO LESBIAN
we're fated to lesbian
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
she got the mcdonald's logo tattooed on her ass. sober. yesterday at noon.
I need someone to play with my boobs. Even platonically. I just need a good groping
I'm wandering around outside asking things if they are god
One minute I'm going home the next I'm getting railed on the back 9.
What time is our conjugal visit?
Umm...who is this?
We should write a country song: “Blacked Out on a Sunday”
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