Can i come over
After you called me a desperate slut? No
Come over
I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
i am doomed to only fuck guys with curved cocks
No more Irish car bombs ever.
Brought 2 entire pizzas with to the bar, everyone loves us
We were laying in the basement dry humping to the rhythm of the washing machine
Bring a bathing suit for the glitter slip n slide
We were running down las vegas boulevard at 8:30 am with our beers cause we were late for our flight
Listen. You seriously only live once... there aren't that many cinco de mayos left until someone knocks u up and u have to have a shotgun wedding. Man up.
The day i have a fb album titled " I have become a townie" you can shoot me in the foot and tell me to get my life together
Drank your wedding present. Sorry
Grandma cant send me 4 lbs of gummi bears and expect me not to soak them in some sort of alcohol
Babe, I'm gunna be straight with you. When you act like a dick it makes me regret not fucking my manager last week.
How did i spend $200 last night?
Every time you went to get me a drink, you also came back with shots. Then you fell down the steps.
Soooo, hypothetically, how long would roommates have to sleep together before its considered dating...
Randomize