You know if a vagina was a face, it'd be ugly as hell...
CAN CRIS ANGEL JUST LOOK NORMAL FOR ONCE?!
what made you think it was a good idea to trust the girl that hides tequila in her backpack?
I just looked at the maps icon on my IPhone and "eR" was typed in the search address bar. I wonder if we ever got there.
On a scale of "impaired judgement" to "Mel Gibson," how drunk are you?
Toaster
getting a black eye the first day of spring break really sets the tone for the rest of the week.
Just wanna let u know that we are almost on the pity blow job level of our friendship.
Never again. I promise. My old gay body can't handle that much adrenaline twice.
I had to break up with him he didn't understand my priorities. I'm sorry but Saturday nights are for pot and Doctor Who. I'm not going to change who I am.
SHE GRABBED MY FULLY ERECT DICK IN A BAR AND STUCK HER TONGUE DOWN MY THROAT AND I COULD NOT CLOSE
I am drunk please bring Taco Bell and sex
Never mind I found pizza just bring sex
maybe if I avoid him long enough we could skip the talking part of "we need to talk"
It finally happened my mom knowingly gave me money to buy drugs i knew this day would come\n
Well, I have no idea where my underwear is, so yea I would say it was a good weekend.
In order to get rid of my bladder infections I must give up caffeine, nicotine and tight pants. It's like my pussy is an angry dictator or something
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