We sat in your minivan all night in a parking lot pretending we were in the magic school bus going to the sun
He was wearing his Class of 2007 shirt so I sat there for 5 minutes and read all the names of the guys I can remember giving head to.
Security said no more parties of this kind. To me that translates to Theme party this weekend.
Living room yoga. I'm too hungover to deal with anyone else's chi today.
Well if all fails we can always become surrogate mothers. I hear that pays well.
I found a bag of weed while packing. Now packing is like creating tiny universes inside of boxes.
Most men with as many freckles as you aren't vagina magnets. You are an exception to your kind.
Do pleather leggings scream im easy on a first date?
My usual answer of have sex with it doesn't work in this situation
I don't know if I'm feeling really nervous right now or just extremely horny.
I'm sorry if you weren't drunk enough to be peer pressured into the naked dancing/group make out that transpired last night
I gave him a handjob in the uber car. Life is really spiraling downwards.
I can't hookup with a guy in my car because it smells like Taco Bell..
nyquil+orgasm=very intense and oddly interesting
We were supposed to have sex but we had smoked so much neither of us wanted to move.
Randomize