It was like a mary poppins bag, except a sexual mary poppins bag.
so, on facebook you can become a fan of butt sex, and also premarital sex, but not premarital butt sex, which is what I was aiming for.
I forgot to mention I threw up in my wine glass AND my neighbors empty cup.
I need to figure out what I wanna do with my life.
There are margaritas in the freezer still.
Just look for the house with the beer knights.
Babe, I need to be clear. I DO NOT WANT TO HAVE ANAL. Never. No anal. No "talking about it"
The background of my phone is you taped to the wall wearing a cowboy hat
The only reason we got away with streaking last time was cuz we had those miner hats
I told him I would only take his calls if he was dead, dying, capturing a midget, or buying me shots.
I stand by my new policy.
And then he posed under the bed and said, "you should draw me like one of your french girls." Why do they keep giving this kid drugs?
Monday is now my bitch. I just did 20 naked push ups on the bar for $20
he doesn't sweat normal. maybe that's what THC smells like coming through the sweat glands...
Car is still out of commission. Looks like it's Grape Nuts and scotch for dinner.
And he listens to me when I talk to him like the hulk.
you made out with another girl for some wings
Randomize
