She announced her abortion via fbk
I have a feeling this won't be the last time I wake up wrapped in a shower curtain with the words "Blame Bono" spray painted on it
Just got back from fathers day breakfast. So hungover i couldn't eat so i just slipped my food in my pockets and threw it out while i puked in the bathroom.
You know it was a good weekend when; you leave a bi-lingual letter of apology on top of a stack of cash for hotel housekeeping.
By the way, I got bored last night and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
So I found the perfect "Yeah I gained weight since high school but it went to all the right places" outfit for the reunion this weekend.
It's only Tuesday and I just measured and checked to see if my 6'5 Friday booty call will fit in the back of my jeep comfortably.
Check the bible. I hear he keeps his weed in leviticus.
Can I come over? I respect you, but I want disrespectful things to happen
I mean you would really have to try to not have fun at a party that doesn't require pants....
Best thing she said after I kicked her out "rugby guys have single handedly ruined my faith in men"
we just talked about our morning and what we were doing for the day and he handed me the addies and i took $50 out of my bra in front of a bunch of frat guys. so the mornings going really well
Have you forgotten that this whole sexy cop role play started with a comment about my mom?
He makes furniture for a living and is basically a hot, younger Ron Swanson
if they didn't want us to do blow at uni, why would they make textbooks so smooth?
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