I love how all the girls on the plan b commercial wake up alone.. Like me
I just saw her punch a kid in the face.. i always knew she was the girl for me.
Well, if they're both my boyfriend.. Then i cheated on both of them.
When I start puking tomorrow, just let me be. it'll start around 8:35. just let me heave. i love this part of my morning.
Is it sad that I just used my electrical knowledge to not only fix but improve my vibrator?
As the night goes on these shots are getting so much easier. My liver jst needed a warmup lap.
He got thrown out for leaning over the bar topless and pouring himself some beer while singing the james bond song
So it's always a good weekend when you don't get any sleep, try opening a bottle of wine on rocks, and end up needing a tetanus booster for our stupidity... Same thing next weekend?
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
you left the hospital looking like the grudge, your mom and I were pushing you in a wheel chair and you yelled peace out fuckers.
I have to confess something, I may or may not have knocked on your window at 2:30 am while balancing on some guys hands. We found tequila.
Your dick is going to fall off. Be careful or you'll get callouses. A workingman's dick.
To drink from my fkask next to a cop car or to not drink from my flask next to a cop car
She's like the King Midas of sexual confusion. Everything she touches turns to gay.
Ended up at the strip club, got told I should be a dancer 4 times, got free tacos and my hot TA slide in the dms. How was your night?
Randomize