That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
dude we were spooning naked in bed with her ass in my crotch. she sharted in her sleep all over my dick.
He shit in the bushes next to the pool at the Venetian, after throwing up in the hallway. You really can do anything in Vegas.
someone just broke into my class and invited everyone to the bar ...now we're filling out a police report. awesome.
A. What the fuck are period panties? B. Don't ever wear them around me... or bears.
Highlight of my weekend: having my card suspended due to "suspicious charges" and standing in line at the gas station yelling at customer service on the phone that I really did go to 4 different strip clubs in one night
Worst ten minutes of my life, it's was like trying to put a marshmallow in a piggy bank....
he said he did everything he could to puke on his nurses because they were doing everything wrong
Thats admirable.
we probably should not get naked in my neighbor's garage again. just sayin
He is dust bro dust in the wind I waited in this unlocked car long enough.
He was dressed as a cowboy and he was dancing with my ex roommate. So I took his gun and pistol whipped him with it..then somehow we still slept together..
True idk how my parents didn't know I was blackout. I ate like 4 pieces of cheesecake and showed my cousins my boobs
Am I a bad person for getting my ex to DD me and a random hookup home last night?
My last 2 google image searches were 'a lot of pudding' followed by 'a generous portion of pudding'
Accidentally searched up "pizza pasties" instead of "pizza pastries". I was not disappointed.
Randomize
