The girl next to me in class is taking notes on woman's suffrage with a girls gone wild pen.
How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
I told him I wanted to have sex to "halleluiah", he suggested the poke-rap.
There's a naked kid on the floor on your side of the bed. Don't freak out when you wake up. I think we need to fix the lock on the door...
I walked home with an awkward asain couple. There was a language barrier but I think we're friends now.
Ok so in the last 18 months I have now driven four different dudes into counseling. I'm like heroin with a vagina.
I just texted him and asked him to keep some in case I need help sealing the deal.
Girl Scout cookies are like roofies for fat chicks.
He recognized me by my ass from about 15 yards away. I must have a REALLY nice ass.
She's barefoot and topless screaming "HERE KITTY-KITTY" at a stray cat in the ditch on the side of the highway. How do I get her back in the car?
At least one of us had a weekend full of money and dick
I'm cutting her off I can't have my good name soiled with these kinds of shenanigans
Shit is preposterous
Well his dad is my dentist so they've both been in my mouth.
I HAVE A FLAME THROWER. COME SEE IT. IT’S SAFE AND WORKS.
He broke his arm in a fistfight with the bouncer. it was neat.
No, he came home, unscrewed all of the lightbulbs, and threw them in the sink.
Randomize
