i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
No i dont need Magnum Condoms, that would be like putting MC Hammer pants on my dick
Life is so much better when you know you're gonna get laid soon.
now that we've slept with the entire soccer team i think its time to expand the horizon.
At least in the future when we're all real people we can laugh about the time we all had scabies together?
I remember trying to cut the power to a house I thought was "too bright to understand the meaning of christmas". Pretty sure I blacked out down the street.
As sure as my left ball is bigger then my right. We will have our moment.
Would you and/or him be willing to dress up like the phantom, sing me music of the night and then bone the shit out of me? this is important.
I feel like drug tests are a little less "random" when you are employed by your father.
I would just like to go ahead and accept my slut of the year award.
It's like 10 times better than an Oscar
Dude I thought she was trying to turn my dick inside out
I will show up on your front porch in a wet t shirt and some mac and cheese
There is a video of you making out with him, flipping off the camera, and holding the plastic flamigo that you had just stolen out of a yard
I have chicken nuggets, lube and brand new batteries, he can stay at work charting all weekend for all I care, I'm set.
He had a vasectomy. I think I'm in love.
Randomize
