Please forgive me. I will pay for your emergency room visit.
when you wake up try not to move. we are betting to see if more sprinkles stuck to you or the pong table.
I think im gonna bang this 35 year old at a kids birthday party in the bathroom at this house while the kids open the presents.
Don't make it weird, I don't think about you when I'm climaxing, it's just that I see you rooting me on.
I'm not the one who gave a guy that lives next door to my grandmother a blowjob in a pub bathroom in Ireland, you have no room to judge.
going on a mission to find my pants and the guy who stole my beer don't wait up
You were taking in your sleep. You were like Jess that's that animal we were talking about and you Hugged her feet
Like woke up with a dick piercing kind of drunk.
Great. I broke up with him before he could like my selfie, now I'm down a like.
ANIME MEN ARE MAKING ME QUESTION MY SEXUALITY AGAIN
Well, I can't remember Thursday and my left ass cheek hurts like hell, I'm guessing Mike's bachelor party was a success.
There is blood all over my sheets and no discernible source.
don't let your emotions get tangled in that sexy beard of his.
just passed a kid drinking a beer at 2pm. clearly it's the last day of break.
Got home. Somebody tried to sell me weed on the street. I've never had to try so little to find a dealer before.
Randomize
