Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
just woke up to two already rolled blunts and a full explanation of what happened last night. I love my gf
She said "Lay the fuck down and ill show you how its done. Ill get us both off." I did. And she did. Best words ever said before sex.
She passed out on top of the bar. Still did body shots off her.
So, do you ever feel like EVERY SINGLE ONE OF YOUR FRIENDS IS INVOLVED IN A MASSIVE AND INTRICATE CONSPIRACY TO COCKBLOCK YOU AT ALL COSTS?
I think I'm going to make a pina klonopin before class.
he may be homeless but his dick however is not... anymore.
Where are you? I hear fireworks and you've gone missing. I'm sure that is not coincidence.
The taxi driver was going on about how many drunk chicks want to sleep with him when he drives them home. Not sure if he was bragging or hinting
I am just saying if Clark Kent walks into your life, you fuck him
I think I'm crying more because after all these years he never learned to spell you or use a comma properly from me
We are in Florida for 3 days. The people in charge of shit brought: a waffle maker, a cheese grater and a SEWING MACHINE
AND NO VODKA
We just got in a fight with grandma b/c she tried to tell us you didn't go hard.
What exactly is it about Doctor Who thigh high socks with a matching shirt that says "take me I'm yours!"
I know... It's stupid... It's like, I have sex with his brother and bestfriend ONE time....
Randomize
