woke up to the trail of sugar cubes leading to my bed........was i that uncooperative last night
I am not one to point fingers but since it says your name "wuz here" next to the dick drawn on my stomach I am holding you personally responsible.
How do we turn this unicorn pinata into a bong?
Jesus told me in my dream not to go to the party. I am athiest for tonight PARTY ON
Terrible hangover + phoenix airport + pizza hut....I think I might have entered one of the levels of hell.
Apparently I'm short enough to sit on his lap and fuck him while he is driving because the cop didn't notice.
someone wrote my own number down on my hand and then call me.
I want morning sex. We can incorporate maple syrup into it somehow, it'll be fun
After an hour of searching for my pants, we had three people looking. They were finally found in the oven.
I'm sad about how hungover I'm gonna feel tomorrow.
Damn it. If you ever throw me again, take video.
She's Jesus crazy. And one if not more other forms of crazy. She's 2.5+ crazy.
How was jagerbomb pong?
It was like communism. Great in theory. Terrible when put into practice
Sooooo drunk. We had the best sex ever and after he looked at me and said "That's whats up". I looked at him weird and he said "Young Jeezy would say it" and passed out on me naked. I think i might be in love
Dude come over...were drunk and I'm holding a T-shirt gun and discovered beer cans are the same size as rolled shirts.
Randomize
