We named our party play list daddy issues
When i walked in, you were in bed with a hot chick rolled up in a green blanket and said you were acting like a caterpillar..
Im so hungover that my 6 year old cousine made me aspirine and coffee out of playdoh...
She's an ex-convict. She actually got stabbed in the face with a pen while in prison. No big deal.
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
Internet Is back!
MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
she tried to deny peeing on the floor last night. she said she wouldn't make it to the bathroom only to pee on the floor
oh but she would
Disregard the shoes in the freezer.
Can you explain the plethora of sunflower seeds in the dryer?
If you're staying here tonight, you need to promise me you won't make another bonfire in the lounge room. My girl is still pissed about that.
i may or may not have triedto pee like a boy and then dipped cheese ino the olive oil
Easter bunny might get some gnarly munches and not even have enought candy left to hand out
Operation: 12 Dick pics of Christmas was a sweeping success, thanks for asking!
Stop fucking Sharon's exes.
Sorry it took me so long to reply. I was fucking Sharon's ex.
But what we lack in money, we make up for in dry humor and drugs
My makeup bag looks like it has lips and wants to sing to me... Too high?
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