somehow on my way home with matt, I ended up straddling steve on the sidewalk and polling the people walking by on whether or not we should have sex.
turns out the website for Dick's Sporting goods is not "dicks.com". It was a win either way.
I want to fuck you on the side of the bed tonight.
babe, don't say it like that!
I'm sorry, I want to penetrate you on the edge of our sleeping quarters this evening.
Wow thanks 4 throwing jello at me an yelling who invited that guy to all the guys at the bar
there's a guy pushing a keg up the street in a shopping cart. you have to love graduation
You are the only one who would stop a bum, tell him to open up, then pour straight vodka in his mouth. You made his year.
I totally cried the whole time and then screamed out my new therapists name....
We made it a contest to fuck on everything in your room while you were on vacation.
I got us a lift home. Payment may require me giving road head, are you cool just chilling in the back seat pretending to be oblivious to this happening?
Given everything we have talked about, is it wrong to ask you to be faithful to me, despite still dating him?
The sign say "Kereoke" strip bar. 5 more beers and ill be ready to rumble.
the fat lady is now rubbing her stomach and staring at me. I hate trains
Did i tell you that he's legal and i got his number? Because he's legal and i got his number. THIS BITCH AIN'T GOING TO JAIL YET
He made me twerk for scrambled eggs... I regret nothing
Dude. I need you to practice dancing around in your banana hamock. Party boy style. I'll call later with details.
Randomize
