Im so sleepy and hes snoring super loud! i just wanna suffocate him, sleep, and deal with the body when I wake up
i just posted a lake picture of you with a dead fish in your mouth. happy july 5th.
He has that cheese in a can and he's eating it. I have never seen that outside a goofy movie.
i just realized the only form of arm exercise i get is holding my arms up in the stand up tanning booth
She woke up laying on my kitchen floor, ketchup bottle as her pillow, in front of my fridge.
And then you proceeded to sneak behind thee bar and hold up an empty bottle of vodka and scream LOOK WHO THE BARTENDER IS NOW BITCH!
Whatever you didn't send me pics of you topless making bacon
And. I know i am a gay man cause when i saw the pic of his cock his feet were in it and i am like what the fuck?
GOOD NEWS I CAN BRING THE VODKA IN MY LUGGAGE
i was on the fire escape while he ate me out for a while before i realized he had shut the door behind us and locked us out and i proceeded to climb down the stairs and climb back into the party through the window.
i can only hope to be on your level one day.
My stripper pole led lights flash with the sound so it's awsome with music
I'm trying to be all porn star and he's making it all The Notebook
I had jack at 8 am= instant drunk
Campus scavenger hunt! and by scavenger hunt I mean all the pharmacies are sold out of Plan B.
Looks like the opera singer hook up is paying off. Ran into the MILF from 407 and she said “your lady friend sounded like a very lucky girl.â€
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