Ben affleck wants to be a US senator. Just thought you would puke with me
No. Please No. At first it was cool when you started bring an extra girl home for me but after 2 cycles of clap medicine I'm putting an end to it.
So hungover. They actually hid easter eggs around me.
But theres a keg here and me gusta
If I was gonna be at your campus for halloween weekend, I'd dress up as the masked horny fairy and give out condoms. I'm so thoughtful.
Just found the last picture of me as a virgin. Framed it.
I feel I must have sex with him first to fully decide where my vagina belongs.
the conference was great. we had to hide the acid in a planter in front of the department of agriculture though
He asked me for a pic so I sent him a pic of my boyfriends dick.
then he told me my boobs feel like "if you put mushroom soup in a baggie." I don't know how I'm supposed to feel about this.
Being a fine ass woman in a world full of fuckboys is the realest struggle I've ever known.
IM HUNGOVER AT MOTHERS DAY BRUNCH AND A NUN FROM CHURCH JOINED US
He was cheering for me from the end of the bar as I sloppily ate a Ruben sandwich. It made me feel really special.
Why is there never any toilet paper at his apartment? What does he wipe his ass with? WHAT DOES HE WIPE IT WITH?!?
she's pretty fucking smug for someone who has had unprotected sex with a convicted felon
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