Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
I'm home alone watching The Hills seasons, eating pickles and drinking straight rye. I just googled "how to make friends". Probably not the most pro-active solution. Help.
No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
I hate when you've made an ugly girl's day by having sex with her, and then she gets greedy and wants to cuddle after you cum.
I ate a lot of your sunchips. I mean a lot. Like 4 to 5 bags.
then again I'm sitting on a tree stump completely naked in the dark listening to some type of glee soundtrack.
underwater hpnotiq shots? sure why not.
what whaaaat?! I BET YOU WIN IN THE TEETH DEPARTMENT.
I refrained from asking a guy what he spilled on his dick because it smelled good. Morals.
It's called being normal.
Your message cut off at "shit on the floor". Your life is incredible.
Last night you told me to stop being Martha Stewart and asked if I had Taco Bell in my house
If he doesn't give you the same feelings you get when the pizza guy arrives, he's probably not worth it.
good news: i got laid. bad news: by your boyfriend
Fuck these bullshit days. My underwear are still inside out.
i need to get crying drunk at the bar more often. i end up going home with guys who have big penises. its like God is saying "there, there, this will cheer you up".
Randomize
