Pappa wants mamma naked
we were going to warn you, but we veto-ed that idea somewhere between "this is the stupidest thing we've ever done" and "let's order a pizza"
Why am I in a dog kennel?
It was for your own safety
it's great music for shaving your balls
You kept telling the cops that our ice luge was practice for the next winter olympics
Dude, just be careful. Her invitation for BJ is just a trap for her to stick her finger up your ass.
Maybe we could get a groupon for vasectomy. I'm game.
Wearing a french maid costume for Halloween sure did help me meet girls
Dude, they all thought you were gay.
We may have picked the wrong resort. Brenna and I have already been propositioned for swinging twice and we've only been here 3 hours
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
Did he ask you why you were in his back yard Sunday night?
We were talking when all of a sudden she reach and started squeezing my dick and goes "nice." and then just kept the conversation going like nothing happened.
Holy crap, church bells in Cibolo just scared the hell out of me. I'm pretty sure they were yelling sinner at me.
I threw a lamp at you?
Yes, yes you did.
Awesome
You went on the date? His pickup line was I swear I'm not a serial killer and you went on the date???
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