She's perfect. Funny, gorgeous, 3 tats, been through a lot, bright. I'm in love.
My gyno actually laughed when I told her about his penis size.
At one point during the moaning he reminded me of Forrest Gump
so sad. i just ate the last good 'n' plenty out of the bottom of my purse.
So apparently when I was 2, I went around drinking everybody's beer at some wedding, then passed out in a corner....
This explains a lot.
herpes texted me again. he says he wants my vagina.
ok we should really consider changing this guys nickname...
Even my psychiatrist thinks I should fuck the married guy.
Dont worry about getting me anything... Just put a bow on your ass.
Deal.
he wears New Balance sneakers on a regular basis, did you really expect the sex to be more than decent?
Dear Jesus. Send me strength to not suck cock this morning.
Well, I crapped my pants in front of her entire family, was laughed out of their house, and I had to walk home with shit stained pants. So, yeah, it went really well.
Um..... I have taste. The only thing I am going to bedazzle is my vagina.
Hahaha wearing a fake moustache in public was the best idea i ever had
I feel like i'm being yelled at when you type in all caps.Did you just have bad sex?
sober me needs to have more faith in drunk me.
Randomize