I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
Im watching someone hooking up in the library
procrastination at its finest
Seriously just heard: "we need some good ass wine. how bout this swa-vig-non blank"
hahahaha. Oh virginia: where the south begins
it's a "shave your legs in the cvs bathroom" kind of night
can you please explain how one drink turns into 5 street signs with their poles lying around my room
nah we got kicked outta the bar after the bouncer saw us putting straws up Chelsea's nose to make her look like a walrus after she fell asleep at the table
A girl just told me she printed out my pictures and taped them on her wall. I have to stop sleeping with virgins.
Please. That's just a patriotism boner. I watched Michael phelps win another medal and had to change my underwear.
Going to the beach. Greeting Sandy with a blunt. Wish us luck!
No he can't help me find his house he is strapped to a stretcher facing the opposite direction
You ran through a field yelling "I'm frolicking! I'm frolicking!" Then fell on your face. How is your nose today, doll?
Having sex with my girlfriend wearing my old Tom Brady jersey on the day he's freed is the closest I'll come to a 3way with Tom
I'm determined to sit on that face.
I slept naked last night on stolen pillows. I felt like a golden goddess.
I called to inform you I may or may not be getting laid tonight ...
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