smell like capt'n and strawberry champagne
i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
So this girl in my math class just went to the bathroom, tampon in hand, comes back with it still in her hand starts digging around in her purse, takes her thing of birthcontrol out, goes oh fuck, and downs the rest of the pills. Got to love college.
I cannot convey how much I really do love Chris Hansen. FYI: he is the JC Chasez of my adult years.
I saw him coke blaxckout on the subway at 9 this morning yelling at people callig himself the gatekeeper.
I think I used your jacking off shit when I showered. I couldn't see shit, it was all oily. Fuck power outages
We were showing our tits to everyone because it's breast cancer awareness month and we care deeply
I thought we were doing it cause it's Tuesday
Im done having sex . he ruined it for me after he said " can we use my penis as a shovel ?"
It's not socially acceptable to be drunk in adult world. That fact makes me die a little inside.
Didn't get carded at the bar. We're getting wasted and then walking over to Bass Pro Shops to watch the indoor ducks swim around. And possibly buying a tent.
She doesn't even know his real name...he just keeps calling himself Hans the Third
I don't know about this Sanders guy after all. I'm voting for MYSTERY BABYLON, WHORE OF ALL THE EARTH
Hillary?
Bitch I slept on the ground 2 nights running
So, random question. How much should you tip a Lyft driver when you realized you've fucked his sister? Asking for a friend.
I guess I called her at 2am, demanding that she bring us food. She told us to order pizza, and I yelled "DON'T MENTION PIZZA!" I recall nothing.
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