Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
that drag queen yelled at him and touched me to make him jealous and said things like this is what a real man feels like. it was a thrill.
So in our children's lit class, some jackass little boy had gone thru the where's waldo book and circled waldo. I realize you would have been that kid.
i woke up in his bed to a "teach your baby to read" infomercial. i pray to GOD that's not a sign
we had to stop you from eating moldy cake.. twice.
Remember middle school health class where we used to say that when we lost our vcards we would be on the pill, using a condom, and have had our partners tested first? We were so optimistic.
She looks like she smells of sausage, sunblock and sorrow.
Pretty sure I picked a cat up off the street and took him home with me, fed him tuna, then let him go
.As long as you're some how patriotic with your sexual escapades, I can support it.
guys with girlfriends don't have a leg to stand on when they get mad at you for fucking other guys
College has done two things for me. Given me the confidence to blow my nose in public and shit in public
I'm in the ER bruh, I went skinny dipping last night and a cat fish bit my dick.
I would be down to associate sex w taco bell
Passed out in someones front yard last night. Got woke u?p by a lady walking her dog at 6am. Rock bottom.
So bottomless mimosas = me waking up in a truck bed in a random neighborhood with no purse or phone or idea how I got there.
Randomize