he just sent me a friend request on facebook. i wish it were physically possible to vomit on him through the internet.
Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
I looked him in the face and asked if we could stop. he asked why. I said "I can't feel it.". ...I feel bad; I should have faked.
I am telling you that nothing wakes you up like stomach acid exiting your nostrils at 10AM
facebook friend requested him the morning after while he was still asleep in my bed, a whole new level of creeper even for me
He just used my bikini trimmer to give himself a fumanchu. And I still plan on having sex with him tonight. This has to be what true love feels like.
I know you're on vacation but you should know I just walk of shamed through a hotel lobby while leaving a threesome on Friday the 13th. Fuck superstition, I win.
Last night I made the hotel shuttle driver take me to Walgreens for birth control, and Pringles.
They were both high priority
Ugh, I should just give up, and fuck him in a parking lot, and shave my head and walk naked through the streets of King's Landing.
IM BACK TOGETHER WITH MY BF AND HERE YOU ARE SUCKING DICK FROM 2009
Is it customary to send a 'thank you card'to someone who gave you awesome oral as a gift at your housewarming party?
All i remember from last night was that i was sitting on the toilet for a good hour eating a philly cheesesteak hotpocket... then i woke up... in my bed.
I'm trying to cause a divorce, your hooking up with a felon, I think we need Jesus.
I watched one of the videos of you hanging from the rafters, and it is both violent and sexual in nature.
My sister and her gf showed up at my door with no pants on at 4 AM talking claiming its hot.
Randomize
