Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
saw my dad's penis on the x-ray last night. at least his hip wasn't broken
and thats how i got kicked in the balls by micky mouse
Jizz is so healthy, they should sell it at Jamba Juice. Call it "Jamba's Juice". Genius.
i just found my sim card.....i hid it in my tylenol bottle....i guess to ensure i would find it mid-hangover
which bright sisters idea was it to put semi-formal in the middle of no-shave november?
We always say that. And then its 4am and someone is screaming at strippers.
Judging by my dry clothes and wet sheets, I think I might have gotten out of bed, pissed ON it, covered it up, and passed out on top of it
i hope this doesn't spoil anything but there are vikings and it is awesome
Just made macaroni burritos. Fukkin awesome. We'll have to try this when I'm sober.,!
I am not going to ask my mother to pause a movie so I can have phone sex.
He is really real. Like I know where he works, have referenced him with mutual fb friends and I've seen his dick. He's real.
I never actually go in the club. I get in line, hit on a chick, and convince her to come drink all she wants for free at my house.
Lets just say...I plan on being a bigger shitshow than Miley Cyrus at the VMA'S
I woke up naked and only wearing cowboy boots, wrapped in a curtain that was still attached to the pole
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