he has a girlfriend so we used my stuffed animals to pretend to have sex
We stole some shitttt from king sooper's. fuck yeaaa
what did you steal
frozen pizza, cat litter, and preperation H. not much different than my usual grocery list.
Last night we were drunk and talking about rude things, I mentioned felching and had to explain it to everyone. Everyone was disgusted and asked how I knew about such filth and I told them you told me. Don't get mad. Also a quck heads up, you might get gifts of straws at work,
I wish i could go to google and type in drug dealers and it would bring up a number, a product and direction
I envy you so much. I get girls who pee on my floor and you get girls who leave in the middle of the night
so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
You NEED to get fingered by a violinist. He used his left hand and make me cum, he's RIGHT handed.
I just noticed she took the "toys" too. That's how you know when it's really over.
He blow dried my hair while I sucked his dick. Now THAT'S fucking teamwork.
How drunk are u on a scale of one to couldn't get it up if u had a gun at ur head?
Sorry, but you probably shouldn't come over. I'm too sober for this.
CORAL IS FAR MORE RED THAN HER LIPS RED
Oh god you're Sonnet 130 drunk, aren't you.
That gas station is used for only two things, picking up moonshine and getting murdered. Only two outcomes.
learning about efficiency and effectiveness in an administration seminar. real world application: walking across the street to the pub on break to shotgun a beer.
I'm at the fucking ritz Carlton and I would leave here to cuddle with her. Not even fuck, just cuddle. What th hell is wrong with me?
I think it's called love, bro
Randomize
