Playing drinking games to Nancy Grace totally counts as "keeping up with current events.."
All we did was argue about ponys and drug dealers
ok perfect im about to bedazzle our mini keg named hans. he is ready to rage
I'm pretty sure I told everyone in the bar I hadn't had sex in five months. And then I offered everyone calamari.
Why can't I hire someone to teach me how to be a decent human being?
Getting my nails done with Diana... I'm going for the keep your friends close and the girl who's dating the guy you want to fuck closer
Wearing a shark mask, slugging tequilla, in cowboy boots, and not minding that my spandex is on backwards. What are you up to?
Watermelon juice. Makes everything better. Gin. Wine. EVERYTHING.
EW HE JUST SNAPPED ME A NUDE BUT HE CENSORED HIS DICK BY COLORING IT I DID NOT ASK FOR THIS
Head-banging is a very stupid way to injur yourself. But this opinion is also coming from somebody who can't walk right because they cut their asshole shaving last night, so it probably has little to no merit.
I threw up through my nose tonight. Happy cinco de mayo
After we banged he volunteered to ducksit while I went to work. I think that's true love.
How did the date go? No fake eyeballs this time?
The Lion King Is on YouTube
Until 2 minutes ago I actually had a chance to pass my midterms... thanks alot
there were rolls with just one bite out of each one leading to the bedroom. you were laying on the bed naked and yelled 'you did it you followed the bread crumbs!'
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