i am making flyers for the homeless letting them know about free chipolte day
Found him. He was passed out on the couch at the new place in a room full of burnt pizza smoke.
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
you smelled like vodka, i think that's why my grandma liked you
Great way to live...just blowing loads on upholstery
This hobo said he can't buy alcohol bc he got in trouble bc a girl sat on his face when he was passed out and misaligned his spine and gave him Alzheimer's so Ali is buying him a bottle. This is Vegas.
We couldve played the bring a random boy to lunch game but i made him go home
you were so blacked last night that you jumped in the lake fully clothed, then just went back to the bar and walked around like you weren't soaking wet.
So I'm dropping a fat deuce at work, and the lock on the stall door slips and the door slides open, when suddenly someone comes in. Now I have two options, I can either get up quickly and try to shut the door quickly (not easy to do with one hand) or I can just sit there and play it off like it's no big deal and I always dump at work with the door open. I chose option two, and it was as awkward as it sounds.
Packing a mid day bowl in the Sonic parking lot. Have I gone too stoner?
I recently had a rabies scare because I thought putting socks on my hands to pick up a squirrel that got in my house was a good idea.
I'm sorry but the visual image of you suffocating on vagina is basically hysterical
Well, if it's rabies, your lips will swell just prior to the frothing. Get a lot of good pics!
after last night, ive never not wanted to live so much in my life.
If he’s halfway attractive, employed and cool with me having boytoys, I’ll marry him
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