Im wearin a dollar bill hat and tgkin a big girl home. Lifi is gmwnd
Her body is shaped like a coke bottle...a two liter coke bottle
I think we should boobie trap our beer this time using duct tape, rubber bands, seran wrap, and urine. Trust me I have a plan and it will work.
oh yeah I'm gonna practice throwing up so I can be ready for Friday night. and Saturday. Beth is back, diaper and all.
The higher i get, the less gay he looks, and the more i want to make out with him. This is dangerous.
Hu mahhiw im so tired.i just got done. In fo dleepu. Aaaaaaahh. I qisj my mom filmed me. In axtunf so funny
I am the worst sexter. i actually told him .. if i had a penis, it would be hard right now. BTW thats a turn off.
He tells me he loves me and I say I just want him for sex, then he looks at me like I just said I hate puppies. What kind of guy is he?
Smoked Hookah in the playhouse last night. Childhood was so fun.
All I know is I was dancing to Shakira in his alley and I think rubbing my junk on his car door.
I've already made the "blackout on move in day" decision
He autographed my vag. This fuck just got authentic.
They just dared her to tape flip flops to her tits. Entertainment value cannot be found like this in any other part of America.
I'm not letting you use my bathroom unsupervised anymore. You peed in the sink thinking it was a urinal...
Why did two squirrels just run out from behind the couch?
About that.
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