Do you think Patty Mayonase ever went down on Doug?
Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she can't stop having the shits.
he made me stop in the middle of the blowjob to turn the tv towrds him. i then proceeded when he stopped me again to get him the remote. fuck me.
I'm home and safer than post-menopausal sex; you're welcome for the image. And yes, I did just use a semi-colon hammered.
fyi, she knows we call her the sperm bank. watch your back.
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
All i remember was you crying naked on the bathroom floor because you were cold. I got you a blanket and you kept kicking it off and crying because you were still cold.
And my cat won't make me food. She's a bitch
Should I feel guilty that my husband is cheating on his girlfriend with me? I mean, we're not divorced yet so I still have dibs, right?
If you don't fuck me hard, rough, and senseless the minute we're alone in your room, I'm returning you to the boyfriend store
Well she just asked a sorority girl if she should fuck her floor mate so it's basically like the blind leading the blind
I just put vodka in my apple sauce. Spice up your fucking life.
My brother is chasing tequila with vodka. Not sure how it will turn out, but I like his style.
I'm saying "I told you so" now so that I don't slow down to say it on the way to grab the fire extinguisher
You don't feed me, fuck me, or fulfill me.
Randomize
