I'm in your bed right now
Okay meet you there give me 10
Don't think you can make me leave either
Give me ten I ha e to be ******'s wingman I want you
I'm on that like soy sauce on rice
Just saw a squirrel crossing the road in a crosswalk..my morning has improved exponentially.
OH MY GOD. JESUS STRIPPER. THERE IS A JESUS STRIPPER HERE. A STRIPPER DRESSED AS JESUS.
There were slices of bread pasted to the wall with peanut butter this morning. I don't want to know
just walked past the recycling bin in class, there's keystone cans in it. go cougs.
Im positive, your name was on my abdomen, Im pretty sure thats solid evidence
You have to wear the princess leia gold bikini every Sunday
You paid at the door and they gave you a straw for the kiddie pool full of booze.
After a bit there were two girls who got naked and liquor wrestled. I don't think it was planned.
Do you know how to get blood out of tile grout?
He said the pain stops when I get my shit together and stop being a drugged out alcoholic mess. Could have just said no.
I explained to him that me turning straight is a once a year thing. And this boy just happens to be the chosen one.
I really would enjoy sexual intercourse with you.
Most formal booty call EVER
Apparently walking into a national conference and proclaiming "i'm here to fuck shit up" is frowned upon.
Who knew?
A piece of your chipped nail polish just fell out of my crotch.
Randomize
