My place. Tomorrow Night. Bring your liver, and something for it to do.
his prince albert piercing just severely cut the roof of my mouth. can you pick me up at the hospital if he drops me off?
im pretty sure i just dented her unborn child.
are you sure you're not interested? he's the dunkin donuts employee of the month.
She sent me a pic of shot glasses on fire if that tells you anything
Just faked two orgasms bc I had too much wine and remembered mid sex that I bought doritos yesterday.
He bought me a oreo ice cream cake with "thanks for not calling the cops!" written in icing. If that doesn't sum up winter break, I don't know what does.
No, no, we have to calibrate. What is the maximum amount of trouble we can get into without going to jail?
It wasn't good. I can tell by the way he fucks me he watched too much porn
Its honestly only a matter of time before I punch him in the face... I'll try to control myself until you guys break up
That cat I follow on Facebook beat cancer so we're drinking tonight in celebration
You kept licking my face. You said you were making sure I was real.
I stopped telling people I'm a pansexual unless they ask first, really tired of explaining what that means.
I can't say too many people would say watching their drunk best friends fuck in a hot tub is very normal.
He was married to his college girlfriend for 20 years. Just give him the blow job he’s been fantasizing about since last century and he’ll be wrapped around your little finger
Randomize