Want updates from david's night out drinking? If so text back DAVID to this number. Std rates apply.
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
I'm not gonna not go for it, she's foreign and pulled a shotglass out of her thong.
I think it's time we have the "weird fetish" talk.
I may have just serenaded the sadface couple sitting on a bench outside the dorm by singing Bye Bye Bye.
I told him to keep his feelings in his pants because they're annoying and to just fuck me.
We went to the casino to try to earn enough money to go to new Orleans comfortably. I'm already drunk. This is a horribly immoral start to summer.
Another memory: We offered for a stranger to live in our house under the condition that he took the garbage out because it's a 'blue' job.
We are the best.
Ps. We need to take the garbage out.
By god, his vagina is better looking than mine.
bought a large fruitopia from McDonalds at 7:45 this morning. Spilled it on the ground. Cried. THAT hungover.
Finding out you're not a mother on Mother's Day >>>
Well he offered to lick my asshole so...I'm not really worried about his interest level.
Scientific fact: if he makes a face like a demonic dog when he's fucking you, makes it easier to fuck without feelings.
I would like you to know, a bag of cheese cubes just attacked me at work.
Is there a sexuality term for 'only wants hatefucks'?
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