I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
i'm at the gym and so are four guys who have seen my tits. i need winter break.
Well, let's be honest here. You're dealing with gay guys... EVERYTHING has an emotional attachment.
oh dear god, that would be like watching to female walruses mate. We need to stop going to that lesbian bar...
I think you were giving a sex seminar on your kitchen table last night.
First memory of my senior year: Going into registration still drunk from last night.
I just think that if you're going to run around naked outside, a feather boa should be involved. Half for the flair and half for an emergency cover.
Would it be inappropriate to trade Christmas cookies for sex?
Yes sir I did. I'll be there with a guest. And no, my date won't be an escort.
Well if that changes tell the escort to bring cocaine.
Crying on the toilet and taking a shit. This is what being an adult is about
We had a moment of silence for all of the orgasms he gave me with his beard before he shaved it off.
Is there evidence of another human being getting away with this/ not dying?
Ya know what's the worst? Being drunk and wanting to show someone a picture of your goddaughter but not wanting to open the pictures on your phone because the first one is of someone's dick..
Remember I am not doing blow tonight. I REPEATE NO COCAINE unless I do it with your mom
You now have a new job. Call me around 1pm everyday and make sure I've eaten something. All I've had today is dick and cheesecake.
Randomize
