Night out in new white coat = success. Offered free breast exams all night, two took me up on it, woke up with one. I love medical school!!!
and when he finished he handed me a baby wipe so i could clean up. i'm ok with the fact that he has kids, but not sure how to react to this.
you kind of just crawled on top of him. that was the point at which i became concerned with how drunk you were.
Having a dry hump session to Alvin and the chipmunks surprisingly didn't kill the mood. He's that good.
Sitting on the curb by new england comics with a weeping drunk girl who's eating french fries saying she'll never be as successful as her sister the hand model. She's scaring the nerds.
Throwing up in his bed is not a step up in your relationship
Lets be real here, you loved it when I was on top. With and without the machete.
He always takes home straight guys. He plays One Night Stand on Ledgendary Mode
I just want to like rub my face on his abs
I need help
Dude, my sex life is so sad since I started having feelings.
Sleeping with just one person sucks
I don't know if I'm more excited about getting chipotle or about getting laid
Goddamn it. Hes got me addicted to his penis
Should I go bust a nut on the beach
After my shift today I'm going on a bender. Not saying this so you'll stop me, just a heads up to invest in Tylenol, Gatorade, and Jack
Watching a guy pay his tab with a check. Jesus dude...
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