do you remember how we all fit in that bathtub?
tequila
she moaned out jack bauer's name while i was banging her...
i got a blow job in the bathroom during intermission at the hockey game. i'm pretty sure i made Canada proud.
I was unaware that a tutu and pasties was appropriate attire to this
he said he wants to do me james and the giant peach style. im afraid of what that means. but moderately excited. wish me luck.
Apparently I mistakenly called the hair club for men at 3am... they called me back this morning.
What can I say, we hook up during the holidays.. We're a seasonal couple
She's more than welcome to come too, so long as she has gotten over that me being responsible for the death of her cat thing.
come help me. im curled up in the fetal position on the upper floor of the lib. please bring more caffeine or alcohol
its ok. its hell week the lib is a no judgment zone right now
I filled two of the glass ornaments in my mom's bathroom last night with vodka. That way no one sees me drinking on Christmas. Alcoholic or genius? All I know it makes bathroom trips frequent and enjoyable.
Well when you get back to your computer, there's a nice explanation of pansexuality on your Skype.
These people don't understand my stages of drunk
What good is being a girl if you can't terrorize boys with pregnancy scares??
I was drunk and gave him my dad's phone number instead because somehow I thought that'd be funny. Man did that fucking backfire
Was that before, or after strip tac toe.....
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