two pink lines on a pregnancy test is bad, isn't it?
only if you didn't want to fuck up your life.
the line for where the wild things are looks like radiohead had sex with an urban outfitters
seeing an 80 year old woman puke in the bushes changes everything...
that's spring break in florida for ya
oh my god. the driver of our party bus just said "no drugs unless you're sharin," my confidence in him is not high at the moment
so some random man just messaged me on facebook "tig ol bitties" should i be concerned?
Just puked up hair, tacos and vodka. Hello Memorial Day weekend.
Walmart at night is scary enough without having to run into people you've slept with
he may be homeless but his dick however is not... anymore.
i wondered why i had so many splinters in my hand, then i went out to my car and remembered id stolen an entire cactus
Putting all my energy Into finding a polite way to ask my mailman to fuck me in his car.
I've hit an all time low I just sent a boob pict to fat Randall the one I gave a partial bj to a year a a half ago
Champagne pong turned into an expensive and painful experience.
My life is sponsored by tidy cat kitty litter, Bacardi rum, and plan b.
Wow, I just woke up in this conference with the woman beside me staring at me. This is what happens when hungover people sit in warm rooms...
So you let the Viking explore your nether regions?
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