Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
when the lights went off, all i could see was the glowing of the camera light in the closet... i got the fuck out of there so fast.
Thought you might like this. Had a dance off with an andy bernard look alike and pissed my bed. All in one night.
You went from loaded cattleman, to football player, to better football player, to art major from Missouri. Your future was looking so good for a while.
one night of dollar margs at dinner and dollar beers at the bar later, i am throwing up in his shower and gurgling soap and water to kill the taste of sin in my mouth. dollar days need to stop endng like this.
I know this request is pointless but you two please try to keep the drinking and drug use to a minimal, I have bail money so write my number on your arm and a "if found call", wear a life jacket and act like a responsible 28 year old please.
Where was Alyssa when you were sniffing the bouncer?
Passed out on some guy who looked like someone from Duck Dynasty.
I'm a 23 year old adult who just ordered condoms online from Target because I'm still too embarrassed to buy them in the store.
He didn't have much of a personality. But I had like 100 orgasms, so that's cool.
He snorted adderall on my table. I have a feeling he's not trying to buy me flowers
I'm pretty sure I just smoked a chunk of cat food. Thought it was something else. No reply needed.
He drunk texted me what I think is two snails fucking on a mushroom. Is "you sick bastard" too mild a rejection?
I'm not kidding, he literally jumped in the red panda exhibit. I knew this was gonna be a good birthday.
Sunburned by dick at the nude beach. Bad. She tried to blow me. But. I. Just. Can't. Saddest day of my life.
my Mom is now my Eskimo sister... she fucked my ex in my bed and took a selfie
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