the crazy preacher outside Willard just began a monologue that began with "when i look at a vagina." We should stop by there more often
talk of her extensive whoreness has crossed oceans. thats impressive.
Recording ancient aliens and the third Reich. Stoned you will thank me later.
ttyl tear gas
Oh nbd. She just had sex with a divorcee. On a charter bus. At 10 a.m. On a Thursday.
Just come here and visit. Enjoy the deliciousness of me being legal. Just don't think, and come here right meow. meow meow meow.
No, I did not fuck him for football tickets. I fucked him for tickets to the superbowl. I'm not that much of a slut.
She was wasted talking to my dad about the hunger games than she passed out in the shower and flooded the hotel room...
Got a high five from a Superman stripper tonight
I'm constantly crying, and now I start crying every time I masturbate which is a fun development.
I NEED A MOM FRIEND. NOW.
If me saying "come f***k me now" is talking, then yes.
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
I am coming home with the worst sun burn of my life, two unused condoms, and an unworn slutty dress. Worst. Bachelorette. Party. Ever.
I was so high I kept trying to flush the toilet with the light switch
Randomize
