butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
I miss you. Just wanted to say that before the drugs kicked in so it's legit.
meow
WTF. STOP SENDING ME ANIMAL NOISES. ITS FUCKING WEIRD.
So I'm at planned parenthood and there are 5 people here from Friday's party.
sometimes i wish i had boobs. not on me. just like in a drawer.
Kegger tonight. 10pm. $5 coverfor unlimited booze. Proceeds benefit nuns from Uganda. Bring friends. No shit.
this is the first time i'm angry at someone with so much boobs. she like managed to break my glass and my phone with one glorious swing
Lesson learned:nothing good comes from an at home wax kit.
There was a deer right in front of me when I came. Sex in the forest is awesome
I'm sitting on your porch drinking wine from the bottle. Just so your new neighbors know what kind of people are in the neighborhood
Damn Instagram explore page. I am six months in to some girl I don't even know.
No i dont need a babysitter i have my cats. Cats can dial 911 ya know
Somehow I woke up next to the bouncer who kicked us out of the bar last night...
Dude I woke up with a handprint shaped bruise on my ass, a pong ball in my cleavage, and somebody else's gold chain around my neck. Who's house am I in?
Randomize
