Yeah. I hotboxed a windbreaker.
It's sad how good I am at giving people diseases
we should wear snuggies to the strip club
there's a girl in the library on mysapce. she must have missed the memo.
I go to guys houses late at night, have a little fun, come back by dawn having made their life a little bit better. I am the official blow job fairy.
All semester I have been trying to figure out if this kid in front of me is gay. His cell phone just went off with Britney's "Circus". Case closed.
Coming home soaking wet at three am and trying to convince the front desk man that we came from the library might have worked if I wasn't also roaring at everything.
And here i was gonna offer you a complimentary blowjob.
College freshman give noticeably better blowjobs by the 5th week of the semester.
i just deleted him from my phone. and yes... I did just text you this from less than 20 feet away.
I'm not judging.. I sure as hell am not getting out of my bed to come talk to you about this. but i support your decision
Just described you as looking like "a very cute escapee from an Egyptian insane asylum"
These cutoffs are too tight but my ass looks like Freedom
I think he thought I was too drunk to handle his parrot
I feel awkward having to tell people “sorry you can’t finger me because I will get a UTI and I don’t have health insurance”
I don't think getting eaten out in a smart car behind a circle-k on my break by a guy I just met classifies as social distancing, but I'm beginning to love night shift more and more.
Randomize
