you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
she complimented my bra when we were hooking up. this lesbian thing has its upsides
My ex just called and told me that he is on his way to the hospital because he popped a vein in his dick. Should I go to the ER with him or class?
Let's just say a refrigerator got involved and after that I had to send him home.
Just filled the brita up in the bathtub because we couldn't get it into the sink.
I'm a little upset you wasted 3 beers on your wet tee shirt contest.
Finding a keg in our kitchen would be like god personally high fiving each of us.
So how much of last night are we going to pretend never happened? Enough to stay friends?
Please tell me joes at work safe and sound and doesn't smell like jail?
It's a 'fuck poison control' kind of night.
I really dont wanna go to a traffic light party. I have nothing red to pretend I'm taken with. Without something red my "my girlfriend is away in the mines" story wont work.
I think he has some internal "man stuff" that keeps getting in the way.
Like alcoholism and general douchbagary.
Good to know. If our sexting moves past early 1900s vernacular, I'll be sure to use that once or twice.
There is a pool of ranch salad dressing in my purse...I know thats always been something you've wanted to try..so don't even act like you didn't do this.
wheres my face? and why is my pocket so big?
Randomize
