North Korea, Best Korea!
escape the fate? dumbest band name ever. how about escape the fart. now that is a show i would go see!
jack dropped his pants and said "bet u've never seen a dick this big." which was really sad cuz i had never actually seen one that small...you have like pinch it between ur thumb and pointer finger to give a HJ
Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
i'm starting to get really nervous about the relationship i have with my cat
i woke up with a wedding ring drawn on my finger...if this was vegas id be worried
Not sure. No solid plans. Just tanning nude.
Still burping lighter fluid. Totally awful.
The to do list extremely baked self wrote for me last night says "1. Join gym 2. Passport? 3. Join a gym" And then just a drawing of a squid
Would you mind pretending to be lesbians just for like three emails?
He came over apologized for his lack of sexual skills. Cleaned my kitchen cooked me dinner. And gave me another one minute stand. I think im okay with this
Why does 2015 have to start with so many regrets?
This is a question I thought I'd never have to ask. How many hits of acid did you give your dad tonight?
Never. No amount of alcohol could convince my brain and eye sight that it is okay to fuck him. I'd rather fuck my cousin.
Just woke up to the cat unconscious on my stomach, his face between my tits, purring to bring down the walls. I'm endeared and horrified at the same time.
Randomize
