I prefer the term 'tenderly watching'
such a stalker...
she wanted to love me. she just didn't know it yet.
im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
I justed realized that the word 'turd" is present in saturday
If your still trying to figure out the moment I stopped caring; it was the point in which you said "I really wasn't sure whose baby it was"
"Not only do I bring a guy back to my hotel room....But I bring one back for my friend who's passed out drunk. Now that's what we call BESTfriends"
I have no idea what happened after 2 AM. I woke up on my bike, in my bed, with a deep thigh bruise.
I'm not being over dramatic, but I think my heart is going to stop beating.
Somewhere between yelling how am I gonna make it to my flight and more titie shots I stopped caring
Maybe tomorrow I'll be drunk again and can provide you with texts at a more reasonable hour. Here's hoping. GOodnight. Tebow loves you
It's a "nonproductive" (vocab word) cough. It's like a constant tickle in my throat, like there's a little elf with feathers for feet going Gangnam style on my "uvula" (vocab word).
he could've at least fucked me twice. that's just common courtesy.
I'm sad about how hungover I'm gonna feel tomorrow.
I just got woken up by that guy wearing a Krispy Kreme hat giving out donuts
Is there a single word to describe 'the last guy she slept with before meeting her husband'? Cause there should be.
Idk if you've ever tried hysterically crying in the shower listening to Florence + The Machine but it's honestly a life-affirming experience
Randomize
