I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
I may or may not be laying in bed naked watching The Nanny. Niles is so spunky.
The only thing i was looking forward to on 4th of july was the google logo and they let me down. That and beer, lots and lots of beer
I wore my underwear in the shower just in case i passed out and you had to come in and get me
I just took a shit with a lightsaber in my hand. Dreams fulfilled.
I can pinpoint my loss of innocence as the moment I started masturbating with my teddy bears
Sometimes I envy you, when I'm not praying for your soul.
Last night when you stole the construction sign you told me to tell you that first you did it for the money Than you did it for the music But mostly you did it for your family
I had to rip your toilet paper for you...
Jerry got outside again, i found him making dirt angels in the garden. I need to put a bell on that bastard.
I just heard myself say the sentence "I'm gonna go to the bank then take a nap". 8 year old me just slapped my present self through the space-time continuum for being an old fuck.
We took her out for fresh air and next thing we knew, she was stumbling around the backyard picking dead leaves up off the ground and putting them in her shirt to "save them".
I fear our relationship is coming to an end. Last night I felt the need to bloody apologise for waking him up with a blow job.
Btw I definitely had pizza sauce on my face, a painful hickey on my neck, and I just remember screaming SISTER WIVES because of the girl's 1997 jean skirt! Wow.
Yeah, let's go with that. Fuck that weak moment of complete honesty I just had.
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