We were chasing that deer in the quad and next thing I remember I woke up in my RAs bed. I'm probably in trouble.
She went from zero to smokin in five shots
I just saw a commercial that said "call your doctor if erections last more than 4 hours". I said "disgusting" and my mom said "I know, i hate when that happens." Get me out of here.
found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
Can we have fireworks this year or will the ocean explode?
this isnt the first time ive seen her dressed as abe lincoln
just had to sit in the middle of an aisle in stop and shop because we're too hungover and needed to take a break.
Breakfast tacos?
YOU ARE A FOUNTAIN OF GREAT IDEAS
Okay. This morning the comforter was wet, you were underwearless and using a tiny blanket. What'd you do??
This guy dressed as a piece of paper for Halloween, I felt it was only necessary to sign his penis
I opened my bookbag to put my laptop in and I found two granola bars and a pregnancy test. I am clearly prepared for life
You were throwing up into a trash can full of used condoms. I had to intervine.
Between his smile and monumental dick even the virgin mary woulda blown that man and I am far from the virgin. I didn't stand a chance.
Oh god I found a set of car keys in my pocket, and I have no idea who's they are
the raccoons are back...
Randomize
