Small dicks are the new regular sized dicks.
I thought it was weird that her dad told me to finish and get out after he walked in on us. I like him
Remind me that when I'm pregnant, I should NOT post vaginal dilation updates on my facebook. Ever.
after last night, i judge her for not breaking up with me
i just identified you from a description of your pipe
the way i see it him paying 500 bucks for my fake abortion is karma's way of punishing him for cheating on his wife
No.. It's totally over.. He deleted the poke I sent him.. That makes it official.
That was the gentlest I've ever been bitten in the face by a dog
we need to drink more beer. the fridge wont close.
Fake an illness. Her and her friends are like the female version of guys who wear tapout shirts
Dude, you like sabotaged my shower time by walking in and eating a snack pack on the toilet. That's messed up on levels that haven't even been created.
Novelty of the week: Getting my lipstick back in an evidence bag
Now I'm ashamed that I wore a bra
I found your birth control, it was in your Crown Royal bag.
We hooked up and he sent me home with a plant and skittles lmao
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